SO! Brief summup before we get into the Inca Trail. We did our walking tour with Yohnathan (sic) the next day and it was a lot of fun. Cuzco is a beautiful city and the weather decided not to be outdone. We were introduced to more lovely plazas we didnt’ know existed, gringo alley and it’s fine restaurants, a museum that told us how to tell the difference between alpaca and sheeps wool and a lot of local history. Afterward, we went to an Indian place we had been eyeing and it turned out to be delicious! Not to mention the clever name, Korma Sutra :-) I think this is the night we also had a beer in the highest, Irish owned pup in the WORLD! It was pretty awesome. Next day we went shopping in the local market, I bought an alpaca sweater and fingerless gloves, hung out, did our inca trail orientation and met our (fantastic) guide, Victor and went to bed early ’cause we had to get our asses up at 3:30am the next day to begin our adventure.

Inca Trail Day 1 (Happy Jenni)

Elevation Change Overview:

  • Kilometer 82 (2,750 meters, 9,000 feet) –
  • Llactapata (2,650 meters, 8,692 feet) -
  • Wayllabamba (3,000 meters, 9,840 feet) -
  • Llulluchapampa (3,700 meters,  12,139 feet)

Approximate Elevation Change: 1,150 meters (3,772 feet)

Distance: 15 kilometers

Time: 8.0 – 9.5 hours (depending on individual pace)

3:30am wake up and we’re on a truck by 4:15 heading out to kilometer 82, the beginning of the Inca Trail. It takes about an hour and a half to get into Ollataytambo (don’t try to say it without hearing it) and we’re amazed upon arriving to find 4 half frozen porters have been riding in the back of the pickup the entire way! Lesson one in how amazing these guys are. Anyway, breakfast and then off to the marker and the beginning of our adventure.

We are handed out sleeping bags and mats to carry and although they’re not too heavy they take up a HUGE amount of room (See Angry Jenni). T and I also use the last western toilets we will see for 4 days (I do not appreciate this as much as I should). After getting our passports stamped at the checkpoint (!) we start “easy”, and although T and I are dubious about the definition of easy here, it is quite beautiful. We’re walking along the Salkatanay River with mountains in the background and some beautiful flora along our path. I establish myself as the slowest in the group as I puff my way up to where everyone else is waiting for me so that Victor can give a history lesson. These lessons dotted our 4 day hiking trip and were all fantastic. While Victor is giving his speech, I discover that the bottom of my backpack unzips and allows for enough extra space so that the sleeping bag is no longer that big of a deal (whew). More walking and steadily increased difficulty until we reach our very first checkpoint, lunch time! We are impressed to find tents already set up and separate wash bins to get cleaned up for the meal which is delicious!

We were warned that the second half of the first day and the first half of the second day were the hardest points on the trek… and I’d done a lot of reading on the difficulty of the trail itself, but I obviously didn’t take that seriously (See Angry Jenni).  However, the trail itself is absolutely gorgeous and while it’s raining a bit, i’m covered by the trees and walking along different creeks and waterfalls that are created by said rainfall. Victor has taken up the rear for this part, which basically means that he’s following me at an insanely slow pace just in case I need emergency oxygen or something. About 3/4ths of the way through I’m starting to wonder if I’ll ever make it up all the stairs that are ahead of me, every time I turn a corner there’s another group of 50 staring down at me. Still, Victor is encouraging and I finally make it into camp, falling exhausted into my already set up tent and resting for a bit before changing out of my sweaty clothes into dry ones, having tea and a wonderful dinner with T,D&V and going to sleep looking forward to my coca tea wake up call.

Take Two – Angry Jenni

Good mood until I get my sleeping bag. WTH? This thing is as big as a tent! I went through a lot of trouble to keep my bag small and now I have to deal with THIS? Shit. Ok, it fits into the bag (barely) and the mat can be clipped onto the side of the bag. I shouldn’t be so irritated, but I totally am. I should have remembered to bring my own sleeping bag home from burning man instead of sending it back with Jason. Oh well, time to use the bathroom before hitting the trail. Victor is a fun guide and happy to chat about himself, he’s got a new baby (!) and used to work the cruise circuit so it makes for interesting conversation, that is before I get left behind due to hills that don’t seem very gradual to me… Back to good mood when I discover that my bag expands while Victor is giving some history on the alcoholic and hallucinogenic qualities of the agave cactus. Lunch time I have to use the first squat toilet, there’s shit everywhere. WTF? I guess I’ll have to wait. Luckily someone sees my horror and cleans it up, but then while I’m using it (i don’t squat very well, btw, so it’s awkward for me) some strange man decides that a closed door isn’t enough and has to look in through the window. Yeah, sure you’re sorry asshole. Still lunch was way better than expected and my good mood lasts until about an hour after lunch. HOly shit, I can’t do this. Seriously, it’s like climbing a never ending staircase that you can’t even see the top of because it keeps twisting around. Giving you false hope that once you turn THIS corner, there will be flat land. Then the stairs laugh in your face when your hope is dashed to pieces against their unfailing stone surface. “We’ve been around for hundreds of years, and we WILL break you” they seem to say to me. And they almost do. I try everything except the emergency oxygen; coca leaves, frequent breaks, self deprecating humor, nothing is working and I’m moving into mindless leg pumping territory, hitherto unknown to me. All of a sudden, after hours of this grueling wasteland I see one of our porters! And Tents!!!! Only to be told that this camp site is not ours and we’re a few more minutes ahead. Are you fucking kidding me??? I’m about to break down. When I reach my tent, I do break down. 30 seconds or so of exhausted tears, please don’t talk to me right now, I’m having a physical breakdown. Now I have to deal with fucking squat toilets? These things are fucking gross and my body is not equipped to use it correctly. I’d rather go in the bushes but I’m surrounded by strangers. Fuck, I’m just going to bed.

Day Two to Follow Shortly